mish mash tuesday

Several weeks ago Aaron finally got his shower chair. Unfortunately these things are built for adults and not for little children. With his lack of tone in his lower body and trunk he has a hard time sitting in it. I put a ring reducer to reduce the size of the hole and it works! However there is a downfall....he ends up peeing all over my leg each time I've brought him over the toilet. Ugh. How insulting is it to be peed on? By your own child no less! It's not his fault as he has no control over his bladder. I'm so excited though that he's "getting it" and he's using the loo for number 2! There's a lot less work involved on my part. He's pushing! (you know what I mean) Sorry if it's too much info but I'm just so excited that we may not have to have any surgery for this!! He just told me point blank last night at bedtime "need to make a poop". I said okay let's go! Dealing with this was one of the hardest things of his issues I had to deal with. (Hence why I don't have animals, I can't deal with poop!) You know that show with the parents and their sextuplets and twins? Yeah that one. There was an episode once where the mom says to the camera "I'm so tired of dealing with poop." Poor thing, I knew how she felt! That line went through my head each and every time I had to deal with these issues for the boy.

You know on any given day depending on how I feel my days aren't as hard as I make them out to be. I've realized in the last 6 months that "alone time" for me is very important. Aaron finally made it out to his dad's and after the fiasco with a relative of mine I came home and enjoyed my time alone. Best thing I did for me. It's so important and I forget that I need to recharge those internal batteries for my well being.

I went to a seminar on Saturday for parents of children with special needs. It was excellent! It discussed many topics and issues that parents face. At the end of the seminar I was so thrilled to learn that I'm not the only one who feels what I feel sometimes. There were many parents there, two couples, some moms and another single mom. I identified a little something with each of them. We all have commonalities that binds us with goals to do the best for our children and to make sure they get the best of this life.

I've been able to lift some of the guilt I felt for so many years concering Aaron's special needs and many issues we deal with. So many have told me I'm too hard on myself. I think I'm starting to agree. It came to me that this was my normal. I was judged from the moment I was born and I fought to live from that time as well. I fought to be heard and loved. When the love wasn't there I developed an inferiority complex. I brought this into my parenting. All those harsh judgements placed upon me are what I base my life on. I need to learn to be happy and just be me and enoy being me and enjoy being Aaron's parent even if there are things not at all pleasant that we have to deal with. Some days are hard and some days are wonderful.

Aaron's Antics
This is has been a while I haven't talked about the things he's been doing:

Friday my nieces came over to spend the day since there was no school. They are in love with my Wii Fit as much as I am. Aaron was watching the girls play very intently. Younger niece was doing some kind of yoga pose and all of a sudden I see Aaron putting his two hands together over his head making like the Tree pose. Older niece says look look at Aaron! Cutest thing ever! (I love it that they are a part of his life. It's the closest he'll have to siblings.)

I have discovered with the help of a wonderful quilty friend that Aaron loves glow sticks. And must have 2 every night before bed. Well we use the ones that don't glow very much anymore and I'm hoarding them for special treats. Thankfully Santa will put some in his stocking.

Speaking of Santa...I think Aaron is going to understand a little bit more about it this year. We talk about Santa Claus and Christmas and presents. We'll put up a tree when my friend's girls come over for a visit. I'm all excited! I got him a playmobile Santa in the forest advent calender. HA! No one told me I had to put the freaking thing together! Fold and make 24 little boxes, then sort the little itty bitty toys into each specific day. They don't use words, just pictures and the pieces are all mixed up with parts in different bags. ACK! I've got until Monday to put it together! Thankfully he's going out of town again for the weekend. Hooray! :D